Issue number two: SOCIALISM.
The history lesson will come a little later in the post- first off, let's discuss context. According to Republicans and others, the Democrats are mislabeled. In an effort to combat this, a lot of them have started calling them the Democrat Socialist Party. Think about that- this isn't just some cutesy nickname they gave them, this is what they use in their official literature. Apparently, the combination of opinion about a certain party+party name=true colors. Now, why don't the Democrats pick up on this? Their claims that the GOP is too exclusive could totally take a whole new angle if their party literature started using the term Republican Bigot Party or something. Why let Republicans have a monopoly on defining their party's public image? It would also produce some juicy irony/drama considering the GOP's long and vaunted history of trust-busting and its more recent history of enabling a private health care monopoly, but that's just beside the point.
My real point is that the term "Democrat Socialist Party" is silly for a couple reasons. First, there's already a Socialist Party in America. Why don't the Republicans ask them how they feel about all this? Chances are the real Socialists won't approve. Second, they seem to think that "socialism" is either intrinsically evil or a label that can be used interchangeably with things like "fascism", "communism", "Marxism" and so on. Well, guess what, guys- it's time for a history lesson! Well, etymology too*.
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Socialism
1 : any of various economic and political theories advocating collective or governmental ownership and administration of the means of production and distribution of goods
2 a : a system of society or group living in which there is no private property b : a system or condition of society in which the means of production are owned and controlled by the state
3 : a stage of society in Marxist theory transitional between capitalism and communism and distinguished by unequal distribution of goods and pay according to work done
Looking at this definition, I find it hard to believe that America is a socialist country, or even that it's on the road to becoming one. In the context of the health care debate, it makes even less sense, since a government-sponsored health insurance option is hardly a mean of production. Sure, I'd like to be informed if Obama collectivizes all private property- I like my iPod a lot- and I'd appreciate a phone call or something when this happens. Until then, quit throwing "socialism" around like it's some kind of Frisbee.
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Communism
1 a : a theory advocating elimination of private property b : a system in which goods are owned in common and are available to all as needed
2 capitalized a : a doctrine based on revolutionary Marxian socialism and Marxism-Leninism that was the official ideology of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics b : a totalitarian system of government in which a single authoritarian party controls state-owned means of production c : a final stage of society in Marxist theory in which the state has withered away and economic goods are distributed equitably d : communist systems collectively
This is more specific than socialism, making claims of an imminent communist America even more dubious. Again, I kind of have a vested interest in non-collectivized economic systems- because I think personal property is awesome- and would certainly be worried if Democratic stormtroopers showed up at my door demanding my cell phone and coin collection for the good of the State; however, I'm not counting on that occurring. Of course, I could say that about any party, since not only is there a real Communist Party here, but claims of communistic leanings get bandied about by every party at every other party. The identity of the party wouldn't really be that important, as they would singularly control all means of production and things would suck regardless.
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Marxism
: the political, economic, and social principles and policies advocated by Marx; especially : a theory and practice of socialism including the labor theory of value, dialectical materialism, the class struggle, and dictatorship of the proletariat until the establishment of a classless society
I understand Marx's angle; you don't have to look hard to see exploitation of workers by the wealthy elite. I mean, have sweatshops really gone away, despite American Apparel's claims to the contrary? No, and they probably won't ever, at least not until machines supplant human beings as a labor force. Of course, we all saw how well that went over on BSG, so no need to go there now. Even though I get where he's coming from, that doesn't mean I agree with him about, well, anything else. Sure, his dialectical class struggle model seems to fit pretty well, and yeah, exploitation sucks, but as it is, I'm kinda sitting in the middle of the same white-collar world he wanted to eliminate in a violent, proletarian uprising. Ouch. Also, who has the time to read Das Kapital? Definitely tl;dr. Plus, the Manifesto has all the juicy parts about the workers of the world uniting, massacring the bourgeoisie (you have no idea how hard it is to spell that word without the Firefox dictionary) and living in Utopian forest communes, so I'd just suggest you pick that up first.
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Fascism
1 often capitalized : a political philosophy, movement, or regime (as that of the Fascisti) that exalts nation and often race above the individual and that stands for a centralized autocratic government headed by a dictatorial leader, severe economic and social regimentation, and forcible suppression of opposition
2 : a tendency toward or actual exercise of strong autocratic or dictatorial control
Oh noes, Rahm Emmanuel and David Axelrod doesn't like FOX News! Well, it shouldn't really surprise anyone, much less FOX and their viewers. By and large, I'd say that the only people who like FOX are the people who watch it. Of course, this doesn't imply that only those who watch FOX like it, because I watch it occasionally just to stare in utter amazement as Glenn Beck shoves not only his foot down his throat, but his head through his rectal sphincter. It's quite fascinating, really, but that's a different post. Anyways, the White House has apparently "declared war" on FOX because they present opposition. Two things: explain Shepard Smith and "The Daily Show". "You mean Jon Stewart, a liberal, makes fun of and/or critiques the Obama administration? But he's a liberal!" Yes, I do and yes, he does. Why should this shock anyone? Because he made fun of Bush? Everyone made fun of Bush. Anyways, let me know when the Black Shirts come marching down your street and I'll agree that there's some pretty fascistic stuff going down. Until then, I fail to see how verbal scoldings of FOX News can be called "forcible suppression of opposition" or how this could even be considered a step towards such a thing. If anything, I saw more fascistic tendencies demonstrated by the home-school parents and youth pastors in "Jesus Camp" (the kids pledging allegiance to the Christian flag, fawning all over a cut-out of George Bush and general hyper-zealousness) than in the Obama administration.
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Stalinism
: the political, economic, and social principles and policies associated with Stalin; especially : the theory and practice of communism developed by Stalin from Marxism-Leninism and marked especially by rigid authoritarianism, widespread use of terror, and often emphasis on Russian nationalism
This is basically the biggest, baddest socio-economic system out there. I mean, you can't beat Stalinism as far as scariness goes, hence the heavy Stalinist critiques in a little book called 1984. Unfortunately, Stalinist-era technology hadn't advanced to the point where Yakov Smirnoff could truthfully say "In Soviet Russia, television watches you!" As a matter of fact, the Stalinist-era Yakov Smirnoff didn't even exist, since he was born in 1961, but I digress. So it's basically communism, but with jingoism, state-as-god policies and personality cults added for extra flavor. As examples, just look at the Soviet Union, North Korea, China, Cuba (to some extent) and- according to some deleted scenes from "A New Hope" I found on YouTube- the Galactic Empire.
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On a side note, I think now's the time to mention my absolute hatred of the aphorism that trying the same thing expecting a different result is a definition of insanity. I don't hate it because it's used against me, but because everyone uses it all the time. Literally. If someone mentioned this phrase in a political context to a room full of mixed ideologies, the Republicans would take it to mean "the Democrats keep trying to implement socialistic policies and they fail every time hurr durr" and the Democrats would take it to mean "Bush got elected twice and he was dumb hurr durr". It's stupid. Seriously- I don't care if you have to wait twenty years to hear this phrase again, but look around next time you hear it and watch literally everyone's face light up because they just applied the phrase to their political opponents. Works every time.
Well, I hope you learned about some definitions. Now you can call BS on people who throw the above terms around too much. I know I will.
*All definitions copied in entire from Merriam-Webster.
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